My friends, THE GURU is primed for a nail-biting afternoon as My Beloved Commies (0-1, 0-1 road) visit longtime rival Dallas (0-1, 0-0 home). But calling the Pokes a “longtime rival” is like calling THE FAIR CLAUDINE the perfect mate or Velveeta a gourmet cheese.
It’s an understatement.
After all, these matchups have long been the gridiron version of Cowboys and Indians, right?
George Allen vs. Tom Landry. The Hogs vs Randy White. Joe Gibbs vs. America’s Team. Ken Houston vs. Walt Garrison.
I remember John Riggins breaking off a career-long 66-yard run in the 1979 season finale to give the visiting Skins a 34-21 fourth-quarter lead in Big D, only to see Dallas rally and end my playoff hopes…
…Mark Brunell hitting Santana Moss for two deep touchdown passes on a Monday night in 2005, lifting Washington to a 14-13 miracle win…
…Joe Theismann taking a safety as the clock expired in 1978 and taunting the Cowboys as he did it. A delicious 9-5 victory…
…and then there’s THE CHIEF in 1983, drinking warm milk in a gold-colored terry cloth bathrobe at 5:30 am, unable to sleep with the NFC Championship game vs. the Cowboys just a few hours away. When we locked eyes, he looked at me with the stare of a man ticketed for Alcatraz and said:
“Son, we’ve GOT to have this game.”
Exactly how I feel today as our boys tussle with Dallas. A victory would be huge.
As an eternal optimist, I’ll take My Beloved Commies, 27-24, and you can catch the action at 4:25 pm on Fox as Jayden Daniels & Co. get the #1 announcing crew again. Yes, it’s Burkhardt, Brady, Andrews & Rinaldi, which sounds like a pop boy band that Tribeca’s own REAL ESTATE ROB would travel hundreds of miles to see. Rev up the jet, my friend.
Meanwhile, nearly 400 miles from LE GURU’s abode, Buffalo took down Dee-troit on Thursday to move my season mark to 13-4 (.765). On to the games…
SUNDAY - 1 PM ET - FOX
I like Carolina (0-1, 0-0 road) at Atlanta (0-1, 0-0 home). The sooner the Falcons turn to Jack Strand at QB, the better…
…Minnesota (1-0, 0-0 road) falls at Chicago (1-0, 0-0 home) as Carson Wentz gets the start for the visitors.
Of course, when I think Vikes/Bears, I’m reminded of one of the late Walter Payton’s most electrifying performances, a then NFL-record 275 yards rushing vs Minnesota in 1977, his lone MVP season. Oddly, the final score was just 10-7 as the Bears rushed an eye-popping 63 times in the game, including 40 by Payton…
…Philadelphia (1-0, 0-0 road) lays the wood to host Tennessee (0-1, 0-1 home). The Birds are in a bit of flux with some injuries and a new offensive coordinator in Sean Mannion, but they’ll figure things out. Hey, it’s the best thing for TOMMY BIRD’s health…
…Green Bay (0-1, 0-1 road) gets win #1 at the Jets (1-0, 1-0 home). New York is over .500 for the first time since the Civil War but it’s a bad week to play the Packers.
1 PM ET - CBS
Take visiting Pittsburgh (1-0, 0-0 road) to upset New England (0-1, 0-1 home). It’s going to be an up-and-down campaign for the Pats and THE TRIBECA MULE…
…Cleveland (0-1, 0-1 road) drops one at Tampa (0-1, 0-0 home). Exactly the opponent the Bucs need after their Week One loss in Cincy…
…New Orleans (0-1, 0-1 road) loses at Baltimore (1-0, 0-0 home) but don’t be shocked if the Saints pull it out. Tyler Shough & Co. were impressive in their opening OT loss to the Lions…
…Cincinnati (1-0, 0-0 road) at Houston (0-1, 0-1 home) isn’t a football game - it’s a chili cookoff!
Oh, I can still hear my late pal, RAVISHING ROY REYNOLDS, admonishing me for serving chili with beans. A Texas native who was all things Lone Star State, Roy was very serious about his eats.
In his honor, I’m taking the Texans but, surely, he’d ask me not to fuss about it.
4:05 PM ET - CBS
Jacksonville (1-0, 0-0 road) falls at Denver (0-1, 0-0 home). Payton & Co. quickly get off the schneid after their opening loss in KC…
…the host Chargers (0-1, 0-1 home) take down Vegas (1-0, 0-0 road). Herbert and Cousins in a shootout? Sign me up.
4:25 PM ET - FOX
Seattle (1-0, 0-0 road) wins at Arizona (1-0, 0-0 home) in a game that’ll be tighter than a tick…
…Miami (0-1, 0-1 road) loses big at San Fran (1-0, 0-0 home). It’s a tough time to be FISHBOY…
8:20 PM ET - NBC
On Sunday night, Indy (0-1, 0-0 road) plays tough but loses at Kansas City (1-0, 1-0 home). If Week One is a sign, the Chiefs are again legit title contenders.
MONDAY - 8:15 PM ET - NBC
I almost picked the Giants (1-0, 0-0 road) to upset the Rams (1-0, 0-0 home) but Sean McVay has had 12 days to prepare for Dart and his mates, even with jet lag. I’m taking LA to win on a late field goal.
That’s all for this Sunday, folks. Enjoy the games and God bless.